Conversations With Healthy People #1: The Amusing, ‘Really?’

It’s days like today when I’m struggling to summon the energy to be a ‘functioning human being’ that I remember an honest and genuine conversation I had with one of my teenagers during Bible study a few months ago.

I recall this conversation to remind myself of God’s grace, strength and sustaining power that gets me through each day. It’s an encouragement to continue being honest about life, even when it’s painful and sucky. I must confess, it amuses me (greatly) and makes me giggle a little on the inside.

I also find comfort knowing that I can come back and read it whenever I need to.

We were discussing how God uses suffering to deepen our relationship with Him, better understand faith, build His Kingdom and bring Jesus glory. For the sake of application, I briefly mentioned that these truths give me hope, even though I am in pain every day…

…another interruption (but a welcomed one)…

“So, you’re really in pain?”
“Yes.”

“All the time?”
“Uh, huh.”

“You don’t look like you’re in pain.”
“I know.”

“Wait! You were in pain on Friday night?”
“Correct.”

“Are you saying that you’re actually in pain, right now?”
“You’ve got it.”

“…Like, now-now? Standing there?”
“Yup…”

and then he slumped back into his chair with a sympathetic bewilderment written on his face. I think he started to understand, which I am grateful for, even if it was just a little.

This wasn’t the first time I’ve had this conversation, and it probably won’t be the last. So, I’ll continue to embrace the small opportunities to encourage open and honest dialogue. Conversations that develop empathy and grace to spur one another on to rely on God and persevere in suffering for the sake of God’s kingdom.

2 Timothy 2:10 (NLT) “So I am willing to endure anything if it will bring salvation and eternal glory in Christ Jesus to those God has chosen.”

 

Speak Up

As long as we remain silent, society remains ignorant. We can empower others and ourselves by sharing truth in love! #speakup #behonest #endsilence #breakingstigma

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#speaktruth #love #mentalhealth #depression #chronicpain #endometriosis #endthesilence #chronicillness #awareness #jesus #truth #endthesilence

Six Reasons Why I May Be Happiest Depressed Person You’ve Ever Met

When I start getting to know new people, and we move from acquaintance to friend, I’m pretty open about my life. The chronic pain is hard to hide as it is, but I also mention that I have depression, and if they ask, I don’t hesitate to say it’s been around for a loooooooooong time.

As I’ve settled in a new city, with a new job and meeting new people, I’ve been told multiple times that I’m the ‘happiest depressed person’ they’ve ever met, which amuses me, greatly. I don’t really understand what ‘happiness’ feels like, yet I seem to project it. After some reflection, I think I’ve worked out why.

  1. When you’ve had an illness for 16 years and have received consistent treated for most of that time, you learn how to manage it. I can CBT myself like no one’s business. I never miss a dose of medication and every couple of years get reviewed by a psychiatrist. I regularly see my psychologist and check in with my GP monthly. I’ve taught myself how to get out of bed, even when I don’t have the energy. I’ve learnt how to smile when joy has faded.  Listening to other people is a welcomed distraction, and I can listen to my body by making healthy choices, even when I don’t feel like it.
  2. Some days are better than others, but the practice of gratitude and acceptance helps me make the most of the good days which makes the bad days a little bit easier.
  3. I have built an incredible support network – a team made up of family, friends, work colleagues and professionals. When the depression overwhelms me with loneliness, I’m rarely actually isolated. When the depression has me hating on myself, people are quick to show me their love.
  4. I’ve found healing and acceptance in sharing my story, bringing awareness and supporting others in their mental illness. It gives a sense of purpose, a weapon to fight against overwhelming hopelessness and helplessness. Being open and honest also demonstrates that there is no shame in having a Mental Illness.
  5. I grew up in a family where depression was understood. I have never felt the stigma society holds around mental illness which makes acceptance and openness easier.
  6. I trust in a faithful Creator and have the perfect Counsellor living inside of me. I have hope in a new, perfect creation and faith in a God who is loving, holy and just. These truths bring me joy that stops an often futile ‘pursuit of happiness’ and enables me to rest in spiritual peace (sometimes my emotions are just a little slow to catch up with spiritual truths).

But please don’t be mistaken…

I still battle with depression. I still have days where I cry all morning. I still have mornings where it takes all my energy reserves just to get out of bed. I still experience overwhelming with sadness. I still need patience, empathy, love, support, to take medication and participate in psychotherapy.

Accepting that I have a chronic mental illness doesn’t mean I have a defeatest attitude. I eagerly await the day I no longer have to deal with depression, acknowledging it may not happen in this lifetime.

You can’t compare me to other people you know with depression as everyone is on their own journey. Let’s be real, most people haven’t spent (approximately) 64% of their life learning the skills needed to be a high functioning. Instead, encourage them to seek appropriate, professional treatment; help them find mutual support; show them love through compassionate empathy and remind them that hope and healing from depression is possible.

1 John 5:11

This is my testimony and my source of hope – eternal life through Jesus’ life, death and resurrection. #eternallife #1john511 #streetart #bibleverse (photo taken in Melbourne)

One Way: Jesus

…you’re the only one that I could live for. In troubled times it’s you I seek, because you’re the only one I need. I look to you and you are always there.

Photo taken in Melbourne was I was scouring the streets for street art, 2015.

#Jesus #oneway #grace #faith #love #john146

House Conference

“I am a great sinner and God is an even greater saviour.” Reflecting on ‘sin,’ our broken relationship with God, and how powerful Jesus’ love, forgiveness and victory is at #house16. In Jesus we have joy, unity and peace! #psalm122 (at Youthworks Conference Centres Port Hacking)

Small Wins

megangraceblight:

There are days when all you can do is cancel your plans.

 

There are days when its impossible to do much but sit on the couch and watch netflix on repeat… if you make it that far. Managing a shower is a plus. Standing for long enough to cook a meal is like winning the world masters.

 

Its on those days I remind myself of the small wins, and remember just how far I’ve come. Try to give myself some credit. But the credit mostly belongs to the glorious king who has brought me here. Safe thus far, and safe he’ll lead me home.

To Those Who Say Chronically Ill People Are ‘So Lucky’ Not to Work Full-Time

For those who haven’t had the opportunity to read The Mighty blog site, I highly recommend it. They exist to shed light, break stigma, create awareness and build understanding about chronic physical and mental illnesses. They cover Endo, but also PCOS, IBS, IC, Anxiety and Depression which also come hand in hand with endo. Sometimes when our loved ones read something written by someone else (but it’s as if the person was mind-reading when they wrote it) it can have more impact on their understanding.

I’ve been able to write for them and it has also helped me process the struggle. I really recommend having a look, it’s extremely validating and encouraging!

To Those Who Say Chronically Ill People Are ‘So Lucky’ Not to Work Full-Time

Annie Moved!

Annie is pretty stoked that the internet has finally been connected in Sunnybank #netflixtime! I got my nerd on and I managed to work my way through all the modem’s manual settings to get it going! #yourewelcome @cats_pyjamas_ & @millyvanillie. #computerwizkid #annietheuterus #uterus #ovaries #distraction #painmanagement (at Sunnybank, Queensland, Australia)